Death

Sucks!

I have a house-mate who is being battered at the moment. She's only got a casual job, is struggling to pay the mortgage, is single because of some bad choices she made in the past (or that's how she tells it), struggles with depression since her best friend died some years ago, and just got the news that another good friend has died yesterday.

She's cracked, understandably. The pressure of all this stuff is a bit too much for her, and she's at home bawling her eyes out. It's really sad that she doesn't want to see her family for Christmas because she doesn't think she can handle it, and that things just keep going wrong for her.

Anyways, death is behind most of her issues at the moment, and the way she handles it makes the house a gloomy place where frankly, I just don't want to be! It brings back too many bad memories of all the people I've lost. Kyle most recently. Sigh

Thank you Jesus for conquering death and giving us hope beyond the grave!

Must Read Book List

To be edited and added to as I get time...

Marriage/Relationship:

• "The Language of Love & Respect" - Author - suggested by Shirley
• "Sex, Men, and God" - Doug Weiss - Suggested by Cyrus

Frontline:

• "How to read the Bible for all it's worth" - Author - Compulsory
• "Marriage Builder" - Larry Crabb - suggested by David Keiwiet
• "Eternity in their Hearts" - Don Richardson - recommended by Gary

Apologetics:

Fiction/Fantasy:

Old friends made new

I'm really glad that Ben & Camille McIntyre moved to Toowoomba not long after I did. Already knowing them a little, we've been able to check out churches together and visit each other in our homes. Ben and I even joined up with the same indoor soccer team. This way he's meeting my cousins and a few other good Toowoomba lads, and I'm getting to build a stronger firendship with him away from the pressures of all our existing friends back home.

I gotta catch up with the Rolands more too. Lucy and Dave are far more reclusive than Ben and Camille, but it would be good if the 6 of us could hang out more. Lucy and Sarah and Camille could be good mates. Would be good for all of them.

Lord help me build relationships that honor you and serve others...Amen.

Kids Names I really like!

Male:

• Hezekiah James Rudge
• Japheth Peter Rudge

Female:

• Sharon Joellen Rudge

The idea is to have a Biblical first name, the more unique the better, and then to have a second name that honors someone(s) significant to us.

more to come...

How we got engaged, in her words

Asked: an engagement story.

"Life is a funny old thing. Two years ago if you asked me what my possibilities were about getting married I would of said that it would happen when it would happen. I never planned my wedding or wondered what it would be like to married. I didn't know much about being in a relationship. If you asked me what I thought about boundaries in a boy-girl relationship I would smile and say that they are a good idea, but internally I wouldn't really know what they were. Yet here I am. Two years later and I honestly think (and feel) that I am blessed to be in a relationship with a Godly young man, and together we wish to please God.

To rewind, Daniel and I began our relationship in the beginning of 2009, but that is another story. Since then most of our relationship has been long distance, meeting in person about once every three months. This was really hard, but I did grow so much stronger too! We learnt the importance of communication ( <- my advice to couples: Learn how to communicate). Over that time we still did many things together, spent many Saturday mornings skyping, learning about each other, talking etc.

This year Daniel was able to move down Toowoomba to work with a University group called Student Life. And since he has moved down many people have believed it would be only a matter of time before he would ask me to marry him.

About three weeks ago Daniel asked me what weekends I had free, for he wamted us to go a day trip to the beach somewhere. I needed to get some driving hours done and Daniel loves the beach (then again, so do I). We decided to go on Sunday, 14th of Nov. It was the day after a friends wedding and the only day free before I went on my trip to Byron.

At 7am we left Toowoomba and started to head to Rainbow beach. Driving, I wondered if Daniel would ask me up there..... We got there at 11:30 and went a swim in the surf. We lay on the hot sands to dry. Maybe he'll ask soon... After enough sun, we went to the infamous sand dunes that tower 100's of feet above the sea below.

We found a shady spot in the forest, edging the sides of the giant dune. There we had lunch and a doze. This is perfect I thought It is so peaceful out here, so relaxing and natural. Maybe he'll ask out here."

We talked of many things, from expectations to how many kids we wanted, to silly little things that later turn into in-jokes. Soon the afternoon grew old, how time could fun, and how at ease this man made me feel (something rare, believe me). We decided to head to the car. We had a long drive ahead. Our plan was to see the sun set, but we wouldn't have time if we wanted to get to home at a reasonable hour. We decided to stay over at Mum and Dad's place in Crows Nest, and had told them we would get there by 9pm-10pm.

At five we started home, getting light meals on the way, and because to the overcast sky we missed the sunset completely. Daniel suggested to watch the sunrise the next day to make up for it. I aggreed. Sunrises were more our thing any way. Time crawled on the way home. Though we talked of many things there were a few long silences were I got to think. I thought of how blessed I was, then I remembered that of my own exceptions for that day. We were on the way home, and Daniel still hadn't asked me... On the day we all thought he would. . . It was then I realised that I was silly to think like this. I reminded myself that he would ask when he was ready, and I would do far better not worry. So I didn't. I felt at peace once more.

We got to my parents about 10. Dan and I agreed that we would get up at 4am and find a place to watch the sunrise then I went to bed. It had been a long day.

The next morning I woke to the ringing of my phone alarm in my sisters inky black cool room. After some time I got up and dressed and found Daniel waiting. Together we drove around looking for a place to watch the sun rise. Daniel then thought why not go the falls? At first I though that is silly, it's in a forested area, but then he reminded me of how a forest changes hue and be come golden at sunrise. I knew he was right so of we went. We got there as first light started to break. We walked and climbed a little until we found the optimal spot. Nature calls Daniel and he leaves me with the cameras to take photos. I watch and snap as the sun changes colour. As the forest started to wake so did my mind.

the sun shining though the valley by the crows nest falls

Dan comes back and we talk and he asks me about my roots and where do I feel that I belong. We sit timelessly as the leaves turned gold then green. Time did continue to move on, though I barely remember how much so. Daniel took the cameras and shoved them into his pockets. Time to go he said, but before we do lets do a trust exercise. He holds my hands, ok I reply. he asked me to close my eyes and listen to his voice. He led me around the rocks back the way we had come. He sits me down and I think that we are about to go down a big drop... but we don't. He held me tight. Open your eyes. Sarah, the reason I asked you about your roots before is because I would like you to uproot and join me. Start a family together. Sarah, will you be my wife, will you marry me?

I could not believe it.... even now thinking back I start to flood with emotion. I look in front of me an array of objects. The ring box and bible catch my eye the most. I didn't expected it. Not at all. Because my mind was still waking up, or just because I choose to wait patiently I don't know. But I feel so blessed to be asked the way I was.

!!!!! :D

Thank you Daniel"

Got the Ring!!

At last, I've finished paying off and taken delivery of my engagement ring for Sarah!! I'm really excited!! :)

Finished!!!

I paid off the whole bridal set for my girl!!!! It's away getting resized at the moment. Will be sent down here to Toowoomba very soon, and then it's just a matter of picking my moment!! I'm pretty excited!

Oh yeah, I moved to Toowoomba btw. And I got a new car too! I should tell that story soon. :)

What is being a man really about?

It's a question I struggle with a lot. I finally found someone else who wrote exactly what I think and feel, so I dont have to!

What does it mean to be a man?

Agreed Bill!! Unreserevedly!

Actual Trek

Well it's been a week now since Ben McIntyre and I went trekking for our tour of the volcanic plugs, so I guess I should write something up as a follow up. Hmm, so here is the proposed route we were gonna take. Thanks to Ben and Ergon Energy for our cloud-free map. :)

So yeah we struck out and climbed the first plug, Mt Jim Crow without any real difficulty. Slow going because Ben's wife Camille came along. But that was ok. She headed home in the car when we got back to the bottom, and we set off along the cattle fields for the next plug we meant to climb.

Took us about two hours to reach it, including a stop for lunch, then about another hour and a half to get up, because it was absolutely covered in heavy vines and rainforesty growth on the near side. We were pretty buggered by the time we hit the top, so took rather a long break. Ben tried to get some map readings on his phone but the signal was too low.

We had to use the ropes a bit to get down the other side of this second plug, and we dropped directly into a jungle of overgrown lantanna. It took us the better part of two hours and a lot of scratches and scrapes before we finally got clear of it. We crossed old Byfield road at 1600 hours, only an hour from when we'd meant to be on top of the next plug and setting up camp. It looked to be a good 2klm to the base of the next plug, so we pushed for it as hard as we could, but by the time we hit the bush at the bottom and got a good look at the sheer cliffs we decided it would be crowning stupidity to attempt the climb at night or in failing light. So we set up camp at the bottom.

Did the usual thing you do around a fire...talked heaps, cooked food, ate it, toasted some marshmallows, talked some more, messaged our girls. Finally got to sleep sometime after 2100 hours, still undecided about whether to climb the third plug the next morning. There wasnt a breath of wind and the night birds (curlews mostly) were squawking away.

We'd collected a lot of firewood, but Ben couldn't get comfortable to sleep so just kept feeding the fire. I dozed off pretty easy, and woke feeling cold a fair bit later. Fire had burned down to coals, it was dead silent and still all around us, which struck me as odd at the time. Being a bush kid I should have known, but wasnt alert, too tired and groggy with sleep.

Anyways, I woke Ben and we collected a heap more firewood. The ground was pretty cold by now, so we got some branches together and made some crude beds from leaves, just to keep our backs off the ground. Then we built the fire up to a roaring big blazer and got comfy. Just ready to drop off when this strange wind came out of nowhere. Of course all the trees around us starting swaying and creaking, effectively keeping us awake. Gum trees can make some pretty weird noises in the wind at night! This went on for about half an hour then the wind passed. It was still deathly still all around us.

Then the rain came. Not heavy, just spits and spots, enough falling in our faces to keep us awake and make us very grumpy. That only lasted about ten minutes though, and it was all quiet again when I heart this twig crack away on our left in the bush. I put it down to a bandicoot, but the silence was making me uneasy, so I got a torch in one hand and my hunting knife in the other, and wriggled a bit closer to the fire. Ben's head was up...listening.

Then there was another twig crack away on our right, my side of the fire. I decided to not let my mind play tricks on me, it was probably only a scrub turkey or wallaby or something. I glanced across the fire and saw Ben reach for his knife. That unnerved me cos he's a bush kid too and he was feeling the heavy silence too.

Not thirty seconds later, just when I'd convinced myself my mind was running rampant with me, twigs started snapping and bush rustling all around us. Ben was up on his feet and gazing into the night, then he shouted "Dingos!!" He said later that he looked around for me as he said it and I was already up with my knife drawn and crouched for a fight. I dont remember it, just that I was up and gazing into the night, where we could see a whole lot of dog bodies moving around the edge of our ring of firelight. We reckoned there must have been about ten or fifteen of them, so we started yelling and grabbed some burning sticks, hoping to frighten them off.

It worked, they bolted into the night, causing a racket that made us realise these were no true dingoes, who are skilled at silent movement in the bush. This was a pack of feral dogs, the most dangerous kind, since they dont have the same fear of man that true wild animals do. Anyway, we heard them pelting through the bush, then counted eight of them as they ran over a dam wall a little distance away. They stood out stark against the night sky as they went over the wall, as everything else was flat for miles around.

We were just settling down when we heard another quiet crack off to our right. I was still holding my burning stick and knife, so I charged the bush in that direction. Ben thought I was crazy, but I could see fairly well two more dogs trying to sneak away. They bolted when I charged though. So that made at least ten.

We were pretty jumpy afterwards and got no more sleep all night, just packed up the camp and ate the rest of our food so we could travel light the next day. We decided not to attempt any more climbs, too dangerous with a pack like that around. So at first light of dawn we were up and making good time across the cattle fields. We were heading in more or less the same direction the dogs had run off the night before, and we found a freshly killed Hereford carcass against one fence. We stood there looking at the gnawed bones, spilt entrails, torn skin, and thanked God for keeping us awake last night. That was last night's dinner for those dogs, and it could easily have been us if they found us napping.

Anyway, after that we made really good time, stopping only to take a photo of the sunrise, which was gorgeous. We then found a power line and decided to follow it to the road. Ben messaged his wife who came out to pick us up from the road that runs along Hedlow Ck. Got home around 8am Sunday morning, after a pit stop at Maccas to recharge the energy levels, then hit the beds. I slept all day!

Ben plotted our actual route at work the next day, mostly from his memory of the lay of the land and the landmarks we'd used, and this is the result.

"Here's where we ended up going bro… not a bad crack with no sleep. That morning after we actually walked 4.8kms to hedlow crk… much further than I thought!" Ben's comment to me in the email.

Trekking

A good friend of mine...Dave Carnell, and two of his mates are walking 2000 klms from Cairns to Stanthorpe to raise awareness of the 2000 languages that still dont have a single word of written Scripture.

It's an incredible undertaking, has been well organised and promoted, and I'm rooting for them all the way! Their website www.the2000walk.com is great for a visit and to track how they are going.

All this walking has inspired me, so tomorrow I'm going trekking with Ben McIntyre, my best mate James' older brother. We're gonna go climb a string of the volcanic plugs that line the coastal flatlands between Rocky and Yeppoon, camping overnight on top of one of them and heading out again Sunday morning to be picked up by his wife Camille when we get to Lake Mary. I'm gonna enjoy it so much, but I'l be totally stuffed afterward!

We're supposed to be travelling light, but my backpack feels like a lump pf lead!! Here's what I stuffed into it.

• Matches & lighter
• Newspaper (for fire kindling)
• Two party horns for if we lose each other
• 15m rope
• 2 cans fruit salad
• 2 cans Chunky soup
• Soup cooking mug
• 6 apples
• 1 small meatloaf
• 2 cobs corn
• 5 litres water
• insect repellent
• sunscreen
• long handle tongs for fire cooking
• spare undies...lolz just in case
• toilet paper
• phone
• camera
• Bible

I'll also be wearing a hunting knife and a couple of torches, dressed up in a beanie and broad-brim hat, red necktie, long sleeve shirt and undershirt, army pants with broad belt, long woolen socks, cross-trainers and boot protectors.

Sure it's all a bit too much...maybe. But I dont want to go unprepared. :) And trekking is thirsty hungry work. Ben and I are gonna be on our own for the entire trek, so we're gonna have to depend on each other and conserve our strength.

I cant wait, it's gonna be heaps of fun!

Stacey's mission blog

A good friend of mine and a fellow redhead, CQU lifelong student, and Student Lifer is off to Japan for the third time for a mission trip. She's been with Operation Mobilisation (OM), Student Life (SL), and now she is going back with School of Youth Ministries in English (SYME). Sometimes it seems to me that she is a bit static. She's always there, quite dependable, can get almost anything organised and done in no time at all. But I've never seen her get really excited about stuff to do with Jesus or her faith. Yet she continues to be faithfully active in Christian uni and young adult groups, serving in her church, and she keeps on going on missions overseas!

So I've had to wonder about some other friends of mine who are always going on about how awesome Jesus is and what a difference He makes in their life. You hear all about it, but you never see them actually being faithful in things that matter. They are like great big noisy horns that everyone looks at and goes either WOW! or OW!

Now I'm not knocking excitement and being keyed up for Jesus...that's great! But it's not essential, and sometimes the quiet worker can have far more impact than the popular trumpet.

I think the key is to find your God-given role, and then DO IT! Do the very best you can for Jesus where you are, while you are.

Lord help me walk my talk :)

Stacey's mission blog is...http://stacey-syme.blogspot.com/

Gutters!

Helped out at my church this morning. Saturday mornings are usually Skype dates with Sarah, but this morning we pushed it back a bit so I could give a hand with the working bee. So headed down there at 8am and helped the fellas. Was great fun clinging to the back of the ute as Peter Garton raced around, then racing his brother Dave to see who could yank the most of the gutter brackets off. I got smashed!

Then good ole Brendan rocked up and we got some roofing screws from Bunnings to fix some loose sheets of tin, and ripped two rust old ones off the walkway roof completely. We'll replace them some other time. A couple of the ladies brought some smoko and we stopped for a bit...then back to it and cleaned up and dumped all the old guttering and tin, packed up and headed home.

What a fine way to spend the morning! Just some good male companionship and banter as we all worked together to do something worthwhile. Churches don't do enough of this sort of thing any more, and I worry that it's only ever on the church building or property. Why do we so rarely lend a hand when anyone else is doing some chores around the place? Hmm, well not to whinge, but to work! And set a good example is the best option. God help me always be a good example, and not forget to serve others.

Jewelery Shopping??

I'm looking for an engagement ring. Planning to ask my sweetheart, the beautiful Sarah Venn to marry me by mid October. So I talked to her about styles and such.

She likes princess cut (square) diamonds on a yellow gold base. So I've been looking around the local Jewellers here in Rocky...and they keep offering stuff that is way out of my price range. My budget is between $500 and $1500 for the engagement ring, and willing to negotiate up to about $2200 for a matched set of engagement plus wedding ring. Does that seem cheap? Or exy? See I really have no experience buying jewelery at all. I've only bought her trendy stuff before, spur of the moment style. Anyways...gotta keep looking...:)

Surprisingly...this is a lot of fun! I've heard some fellas groaning and telling horror stories about finding the perfect ring, and about how their girls dont like it for this or that reason. I'm having a rad time looking and learning! :)

Wondering about rings

I want to marry Sarah Jane Venn. I've decided to ask her to marry me, and now I'm looking at rings. I asked her to look at some designs for a hypothetical ring. She sent me these two. Now I need to decide which and look at budgeting, etc.

http://www.goldenet.com.au/solitaire-ring-engagement-14k-yellow-gold_E110Y.html

http://www.goldenet.com.au/three-stones-ring-engagement-14k-yellow-gold-3mm-0.24-carat_E107Y.html

I'm excited, and nervous, and cant wait!!

God help me :)

Upper Stoney

Went camping with my lovely at upper stoney Ck on Friday...stayed till Sat afternoon.

Awesome spot, nice views and quiet area. Really liked it. Had some great talking time.

Bad stuff. Didn't pray hardly at all. Almost forgot about God. Almost did IT. We got very close, and things almost got completely out of hand. But God was there still, and He took some rather drastic efforts to ensure that we couldnt get it done. :) Most humbling moments of my life.

Then it was down to the beach for a rest and revive, fish and chips and then home. Thank you Sarah and Father for a wonderful day.

Shocked and disappointed with the coup mounted by Julia Gillard to force out Kevin Rudd as our prime minister. The Australian people voted in Kevin, NOT Julia as PM. It's really disappointing to see democracy and a fair go just get chucked out the window in favor of the candidate with the most big business and industry backing. Sigh...what is my country coming to?

I've been reminded again today and yesterday about the importance of love, tolerance, and understanding in relationships. My Dad and my little brother had a disagreement over something stupid, and now it seems like the only solution is for little brother (Adam) to leave home. He's 19, so he'll survive all right, but it just sucks that Dad is going back over his old mistakes and repeating them a little worse each time. He's pushed each one of us away emotionally as we reached adulthood, and it gets a little worse each time. Sigh

I fear his example being passed on to me. I was just getting used to the idea of maybe getting married and eventually being a Dad, when this happens and I'm reminded again of Numbers 14:17-19 , Dad never had a good relationship with Grandpa, and was kicked out of home at 16, now he seems to repeat that mistake with each of his own sons. He's never violent, just drives us away with psychological and emotional blackmail. Sigh

God help me learn from other fathers to be a good Dad!

It's so cold and dark...

Hi! How are you?

Same old, same old...

So nothing's changed then?

yeah sorta, I've got a couple more options for you

Really? like what?

your girlfriend for one. all that filthy lust you keep hiding about her...that's gotta be my first choice for you at the moment

you're one sick old shade you know that!

naturally, you made me that way :)

Sigh...dont remind me!

no need, you're pretty good at it yourself!

Why dont you just leave me alone?

because you keep on feeding me. I'm really staying quite healthy you know.

yeah well I'm not gonna feed you any more!

heard that before. You'll give me anything I want, you dont know how to stop

Sure I do, I'll just ignore you!

like you ignore your housemate? You really hurt him you know...I love watching his face fall every time you turn away or close your door...but best of all is when you just say nothing, pretend he doesnt exist...I LOVE it!

I hate you.

nahh...you love me, you keep on giving me everything I want

I do NOT!

okay, so why did you make all those sarcastic remarks about your teammates at the game last night?

No one heard me, it didnt hurt them.

I heard you, so did they, and so did HE!

leave HIM out of this!

I will if you will.

He's my only hope to be rid of you, HE told me not to let you exist!

good advice, if only you'd learn to listen

I do listen!

indeed, you just dont learn!

I do too!

stop lying, you're bad at it, and it only gives me one more thing to throw at you

Well at least I am bad at it...gotta count for something.

lovely! you're vain as well as proud. We've got almost all seven sins right here! What a sweet candidate you make for a God-centered missionary...you FRAUD!!!

I am not a fraud, HE has made me real!

more real than me?

You aren't real

so how come you aren't sleeping because of me?

It's not you, it's the coffee!

Liar! blame the coffee...you disgust me. You cant even tell the difference between me and my baits any more...

I can too, you dont exist unless I let you.

but I can make you lose your mind, act irrationally, endanger yourself, and destroy your body!

Only if I allow it! And I wont...

go to sleep then

I cant!

told you...you fear me

sigh...I suppose I do

poor confused creature, I have you totally in my power

well at least you are losing ground in one area...support!

hahahaha! losing ground? when more than 15% of your support is PLEDGED! do you really think these people who keep saying they'll start when you do are genuine? It's just an excuse! You'll never start, and nor will they!

They've pledged it to HIM! HE wont let them off easy...

funny, I thought you were preaching him as being very loving and forgiving...

That's not the same thing!

whatever, you are mine now, and that's just the first course, you have no idea what I've got cooking for the mains...and we mustn't forget dessert either....hahaha

*cringe*

Reb! Milesy! Matt! Andrew! Binney! Meg!

StopstopSTOP...I'll scream so loud I cant hear you.

you have to stop sometime...I'll be waiting...

I can give them all to HIM! He'll be sad with me, but HE will forgive.

Hey stop that!

I wont, HE's my only hope, I'm giving them all to HIM.

Fine! remember....her!!!!

NO!

you wouldn't dare!

I just did!

and there you lost me, for she alone I know for certain is gone forever beyond your reach. she is wtih HIM now! you lose. for the faith that brought her through will bring me through too.

NO NO NO!!

yes, and in HIS name I banish you, leave me, and trouble my dreams no more!

...

.

.

..

I think he's gone...

No I'm not!

YES YOU ARE!

hallo?

HALLO MY FRIEND

sigh, I'm so tired. He wouldnt leave.

YOU DID WELL MY SON, HE WONT BE BACK TONIGHT

thank you...but what about tomorrow? and after?

TRUST ME. I WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU.

but sometimes it's so noisy, or...so quiet, and yet I still can't hear you

KEEP YOUR MIND FOCUSSED ON ME! I WILL NOT HOLD BACK ANY GOOD THING FROM THOSE WHO LOVE ME AND SEEK ME WITH THEIR WHOLE HEART.

but Father...

NO BUTS!

yes Father...oh but I am so tired...

GOODNIGHT MY SON

sigh...

I LOVE YOU

May Newsletter

I'm writing a newsletter for last month and covering a bit of this month as well. I do this every month for my university ministry with Student Life. IT helps keep in touch with people and let them know how I'm going as well as being a good way to ask for prayer.

At the start of may I went to Toowoomba because Sarah's brother was getting married, and I want to use a pic of that in my newsletter. Think this one is the best, but I should probably ask her opinon...

Anyways, back to it. Writing newsletters is always fun, but I'm a perfectionist, so it takes me a while to get it done!

Anyway, later chaps. :)

Currently going through the book of I Samuel in the Old Testament with my sweetheart Sarah, for a number of reasons.

1. To spend time together in God's Word.
2. To ensure that we both have some form of Quiet Time in our daily lives
3. To get a good grip on the story of Samuel, since it is what Ian Belz is teaching on at my church.

We're up to Chapter 12 today, I might post some of the highlights we get from it, from time to time.

BibleGateway is so good, allows us to change to whatever version we like, and read along with each other wherever we are.

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1%20Samuel%2011&version=NIV

My Lovely sent me this today.

I think it's the sky in Toowoomba.

Anyway, it's pretty, she's lovely,

and I'm totally smitten. :)

My girlfriend is trying to find me!!

And I'm hiding, and drinking coffee!

It's fun...considering she's 700klm away.

We stalk each other around cyberspace!

Not like really being together....but the

best we have for now.

Peace :)

I'm back!

And posting my QTs didn't work all that well. So much of them is personal!

Guess I'll just post about other stuff from time to time.

God's good, I'm back, and yeah!